Missed Connections


I just discovered the ‘Missed Connections‘ section on craigslist.com. I find most of it romantic, some of it lonely, and some of it is unabashedly sexual. A friend and I had a conversation the other day about how we always seem to be creeping on people who don’t creep back. We concluded that we must be common looking. “The Lord prefers common-looking people. That is why he makes so many of them.”* We have strength in numbers.

Anyways, “Missed Connections” is the possibility that someone once saw me on the train and thought “I wan’t a little sugar in my bowl / I want a little sweetness down in my soul”** (in reference, or course, to my own sugar). Not that I am trawling through the interwebs in hopes that I will bump into the guy I was drooling over in Gristedes (I am too much of a statistician). Not that I am lonely (I am too much of a loner). Just that it’s good sometimes to hear someone say “Ausi, ako atamele hle”***.

Below is a mish-mash of some entries I found. (There are URLs to the individual entries scattered in there). I only added full-stops and one question mark.

****
I‘m boyish for my age, had on a black t’shirt and helmet. You were big, shirtless, sweaty and handsome. You nodded and flashed an adorable smile. We exchanged glances several times while we were working out Sunday around noon. You were wearing a ‘New York Boxing Club’ tshirt, I was in a plain grey tshirt. aside from the occasional smoke, you are the most handsome man i’ve seen in ages.
A while back we were in the sauna together – with someone else – the extremely beautiful man eating a sandwich from elixr. all I wanted to do was check out your tight body but didn’t want to stare. My mom always told me that was inconsiderate.
I came up to you and was interested in your gauges. You were Colombian and adorable but my friend was returning and I didn’t get a chance to grab your number.  I believe we might have kissed but not entirely sure.
even though you are straight, I feel that its mutual. Am I wrong? I look at you, and I want to run my fingers through your hair, kiss your lips and let my tongue run across your teeth. I pray that we are never in the bathroom at the same time. I got it bad for you. it is going to be more difficult for me to hide how I feel about you.
Unfortunately I was too shy to say any of this to you, and am left with posting a ‘missed connection’. 
I hope I see you on Tuesday.
I hope you see this.

***



*Abe Lincoln
**Nina Simone
***in Sesotho: “sister, why dont you get a little closer?”
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